Growing up, I loved this show. I remember getting anxious for the contestants as they squeamishly chose a door to open. Would it be the best one? Would they regret their decision?
There are many times I have regretted the choices I have made. These regrets range from eating a calorie loaded cheeseburger..to being in a bad relationship..to being in a job I hated. I started thinking this morning about those choices. You know, at the time I was making those decisions, I felt pretty darn certain I was doing something positive for myself (ok, maybe not the cheeseburger..). Point is, I was at a place in my life where my needs were great enough that I felt comfortable and even satisfied with making the decision I had. So..I opened door number 1.
Looking back, of course, I could see that some of those decisions would no longer work for me. Why did I open that door?? My needs had changed perhaps, maybe my brain had developed a little more, maybe it was no longer satisfying in the same way, perhaps I did not understand myself enough to be satisfied with anything?! Ugh.
Anyway I looked at it, I needed to stop beating myself up. Self loathing was not a productive place for me.
I have learned that our past is what we can utilize for making the healthiest decisions for ourselves in the present. THAT is what the past is for. A tool for living in the moment. All we are is the sum total of all the choices we have made in our life until now. Who do you want to be today that will reflect the person you know to be the best YOU possible?
Are you struggling with making your own life decisions? Maybe having difficulty letting go of the guilt of a past decision?
When working with clients in individual counseling, I always try to remind them that making decisions out of your strengths instead of your fears is a good place to start.
Contact me today to find out more about my practice and how I can help you as you face the “doors” of your life.Schedule for Cory
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